Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Love, Honor, and Virtue Book REVIEW

Love Honor and Virtue by Hal and Melanie Young

If you have ever heard of Hal and Melanie Young who authored Raising Real Men then you know this book has sound advice with no beating around the bush.  Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality is a no holds barred Christian sex ed book on training your young men to be Godly young men of virtue and honor. When I had a chance to review this book and their other book, No Longer Little, from Great Waters Press I happily said Yes!  I received a copy of this 95-page softcover book.  It is a fairly quick read and is loaded with good information.

This book is written to be read by your tween (preteen), and young adult sons aged 12 to 20+.  That being said I must WARN you that there are some very explicit topics discussed and you will definitely want to review the book and decide how you might want to proceed with it with your younger sons.  Hal and Melanie get right to the point and want your son(s) to be prepared for the battle waged against him(them).  Their belief is that anyone over the age of 13 is considered a young man and no longer a boy. Biblically they share examples of the difference between children and men (young men, youth, included).

There is an introduction (To the Young Men on the Battlefield) and 7 chapters in this book that inlcude:
  • Sex Was God's Idea
  • It's All Connected
  • The Enemy Perverts God's Design
  • How Can  Young Man Keep His Way Pure?
  • Recovering from a Fall
  • Guys and Girls
  • The Road Ahead
In the introduction, Hal and Melanie remind us that our young men need to "fight the war you have, not the war you want to have." (p.1) Circumstances change and people are individuals.  Each person's individual battles will likely look different based on their personalities, weaknesses, and circumstances. They also remind us that this book is a good tool, not the answer to everything.  I really like that there is a summary at the end of every chapter of the key topics covered.

Chapter 1 jumps right in to discuss Sex and God's design for marriage and sex.  I agree with them that "When we do marriage right, we're living pictures of Jesus and His bride." (p.11) They discuss and show examples from the Bible about God's design for sex and marriage.  In Chapter 2, it is refreshing to see how they show biblical references on the fact that there is male and female and that they are distinct and exactly who God created them to be.  The key theme throughout the book is for young men to strive to be pure and virtuous until the time they find their spouse.

Another common practice throughout the book is that Hal and Melanie not only share real-life and biblical examples but go on to explain the how and why. Why do young men think/behave the way they do and how can they walk in the ways the Lord asks them to in order to honor their future wife and marriage.

This book gets real and discusses body parts and what those body parts are designed to do.  It goes into some depth about what battles men face personally in their sexual life and how they might walk the high road God asks them to walk.  There is discussion about how an egg is fertilized and how changes occur in a woman's body as she matures.  Chapter 3 covers sin including pornography.  "Over 90% of young men have been exposed to pornography by the age of 18, and nearly 75% are sexually active by the age of 19." (p. 28)They explain what lust is and what it isn't.  It also covers sexting and other sexual sins that plague our young men.

Chapter 4 is great with its examples of how our young men can stay pure and fight temptation.  God doesn't say it will be easy, but He does give us a way of escape and He is FOR us, not against us.  Hal and Melanie's practical suggestions are very doable.  I really like that they include everyone in Chapter 5, Recovering From a Fall.  We have all sinned and for those who learn the information from this book too late and have already fallen to temptation and/or sin in their sexuality then this chapter shows that there is redemption!  Our God is a redeeming God and His love and grace know no end. It is a very encouraging chapter for those who think they have lost the possibility of another chance at doing things right.

The final chapter digs into relationships specifically and how to go about nurturing a relationship God's way that leads to biblical marriage.  It reminds our young men to not be unequally yoked and what that means. They give practical examples of moving forward as the relationship progresses.  The conclusion reminds us that times are changing quickly and we must be sober.  Yet, if failure occurs, simply get back up and dive right back in!

I'm not sure yet how I am going to approach this book with my son.  I think we will dig in and cover most of the chapters and I might reserve some of the more in-depth sexual ones for next year.  We shall see.  I do wholeheartedly recommend Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality for its realness and practicality in teaching our young men to maneuver the dangerous waters they find themselves in our current culture.

Raising Real Men

Check out my review of Hal and Melanie's other book, No Longer Little: Parenting Tweens With Grace and Hope and also be sure to look at the other reviews by clicking on the link below.

Love, Honor, and Virtue  AND No Longer Little {Great Waters Press Reviews}
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